Although God demands a whole heart , He will still accept a broken one if He gets all the pieces .

August 13, 2010

When I saw you today , a mixture of feelings just came rushing to me .
Like the missing of you , like how I think would never stop feeling upset because of you .
I know I'm not suppose feel sad anymore , I'm not suppose to feel like this .
I feel so weak . So much more fallible and fragile than I used to be .
Apparently I am now living proof that yet another platitude , time heals all wounds , is total crap .

-

Got back a couple of common test paper and the results were appalling . Flunked my Science - badly , and I didn't get the marks I was expecting for English .
Exams are already coming up , and still I don't feel the stress . I need motivation ! :(


I haven't lose my passion for everything that shaped the way I am today , things that kept me moving till now , things like dancing , sleeping , eating a lot and reading , but just I'm kinda tired from everything . I want a break , I want to stay away from everyone , I want to stay away from the one I'm expected to be just for awhile , to have some time with myself . I've been living for every single person around me , but never for myself . This time , I'm gonna do so . Cause I'm just feeling too drained being the perfect me , the role model that I'm expected to be . I wanna be reckless , I wanna make mistakes , I wanna fall , I wanna do the things that every other people are doing , cause I've missed out too much , my life and the people around me .

I don't wanna be politically correct anymore .

I'm not gonna be afraid of the unknowns , I'm so gonna walk on bravely with whatever I have , family , friends , mentor . That's totally enough . Sometimes , instead of mourning over the things we don't have , we should learn to think of those we have .

“ Instead of giving myself reasons why I can't . I'll give myself reasons why I can .”

-

On a lighter note , I would like to have a small dedication to those people who helped me out in one way or another this week .

S.Xueying , T.Yingying , C.Suxian , VanessaS. ,
You girls really never fail me make me laugh at my worst , and hear me whine , complain and nag about just everything . It's really awesome how we don't have any secrets between us and how I can let down my mask and just be myself when I'm with you guys . I really appreciate what eahc and everyone of you did for me . Thanks for making my sec2 life an enjoyable one :B .

C.QiXiang ,
You'll probably never see this , but thanks for lending me yur calculator during yesterday's Maths test (: .

VernonL. ,
You're always there to talk sense into me , or simply talk crap with me . Thanks for trying to cheer me up everytime I'm sad , and for trusting me with secrets . Hahah . You're awesome cause you're always giving me stickys \m/ .

ChrislynY. ,
It's amazing how we never run out of crap to crap about and although I always late or no reply , you would still reply my SMSes , no matter what . I love how we always laugh over silly things when we're together , andand , after EOY , let's go dye hair together , wheeee :D .

CherlynY. ,
Bitchhh , you're finally featured after pestering me for like one year plus ? HAHA . I love yur art , and how immatured and retarded you act sometimes . Although I still love you a lot , I want to give you a piece of advice . Pleaseeee , grow up ^^ .

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