I'm an introvert.

June 29, 2013

I'm the kind of girl who will not automatically start unnecessary conversations with someone unless I am close to that person, or that we have a lot of common topics to talk about. If we don't know each other well enough, I am usually very quiet. I find it hard to be alone with someone I don't know we'll because I hate constantly trying to make small talks. I'm fine chatting with people I'm comfortable with or engaging in conversations about topics that I have an interest in.

I dread attending blogger events. It's not that I'm unfriendly - it's just that I absolutely dislike attending gatherings with a bunch of people that I don't know or never talk to before. I'll usually only turn up if the invitation is for two so that I can bring a friend along. If the invitation is only for one, I'd rather skip the whole thing.

I found a list of a few common misconceptions about introverts and I thought of sharing it with you guys.

Myth #1 – Introverts don't like to talk.
This is not true. Introverts just don't talk unless they have something to say. They hate small talk. Get an introvert talking about something they are interested in, and they won't shut up for days.
I am really quiet around people I barely know but I do love talking and once we get close to each other, nothing you do or say can get me to shut up. I just hate feeling the need to fill the air with small talks.

Myth #2 – Introverts are shy.
Shyness has nothing to do with being an Introvert. Introverts are not necessarily afraid of people. What they need is a reason to interact. They don't interact for the sake of interacting. If you want to talk to an introvert, just start talking. Don't worry about being polite.
I may seem to be a little reserved at first but I'm really quite unabashed once we know each other better - I can joke about myself, make stupid jokes, laugh loudly, etc. But what I hate is small talk. I am really afraid of seeing acquaintances on the bus because all I want is to listen to my music and not engage in an conversation that leads to nowhere.

Myth #3 – Introverts are rude.
Introverts often don't see a reason for beating around the bush with social pleasantries. They want everyone to just be real and honest. Unfortunately, this is not acceptable in most settings, so introverts can feel a lot of pressure to fit in, which they find exhausting.
 I'm someone who's very straightforward and I voice out my opinions without thinking most of the time. I don't compliment someone for the sake of complimenting someone. What you hear from me are my honest beliefs. But more often than not, I feel the need to censor my thoughts because I know not everybody can accept my views and it gets tiring wearing a mask.

Myth #4 – Introverts don't like people.
On the contrary, introverts intensely value the few friends they have. They can count their close friends on one hand. If you are lucky enough for an introvert to consider you a friend, you probably have a loyal ally for life. Once you have earned their respect as being a person of substance, you're in.
I have few close friends that I open up to and I am very selective of the people I open my heart to. And even if I have heart-to-heart talks with somebody, I don't ever tell them everything about my life. I have really few friends that I keep in touch with, and even fewer good friends that I hang out with. If a not-so-close friend ask me to go out, I would usually reject them because I'm very much awkward around people I'm not close with.

Myth #5 – Introverts don't like to go out in public.
Nonsense. Introverts just don't like to go out in public FOR AS LONG. They also like to avoid the complications that are involved in public activities. They take in data and experiences very quickly, and as a result, don't need to be there for long to "get it." They're ready to go home, recharge, and process it all. In fact, recharging is absolutely crucial for Introverts.
I'm not sure about this, but I really like going out with people I'm comfortable with. I don't mind hanging out with them for the whole day, chat about nothing make fun of each other, and laugh at stupid jokes. Unfortunately, there's only hardly anybody that has time for me to do these things with them. Most of the time, they set aside just a few hours to catch up with me and that's that. Probably because just sitting down and chatting is too boring for them. My friends mostly live exciting lives and while I'm envious of them, I know that if I do the same thing, that's just not me, not who I really am.

Myth #6 – Introverts always want to be alone.
Introverts are perfectly comfortable with their own thoughts. They think a lot. They daydream. They like to have problems to work on, puzzles to solve. But they can also get incredibly lonely if they don't have anyone to share their discoveries with. They crave an authentic and sincere connection with ONE PERSON at a time.
I like hanging out with my friends and talking to them. I don't mind being alone, but that doesn't mean that I always want to be left alone. I like being able to share my happiness with people around me. I believe that one person and only have one BFF at a time. The one best friend you have endless topics to talk about and we just need to have that one person I can COMPLETELY open up to, that one person that won't judge me and will be there no matter what. I just need that ONE person.

Myth #7 – Introverts are weird.
Introverts are often individualists. They don't follow the crowd. They'd prefer to be valued for their novel ways of living. They think for themselves and because of that, they often challenge the norm. They don't make most decisions based on what is popular or trendy.
It is pretty accurate to say that I hate being politically correct and I can't stand people who have to be politically correct all the time. I prefer to have my own views about certain things, even if it's against the norm of society. I'm not afraid to voice out my opinion even if it's not popular or different from my friends'.

Myth #8 – Introverts are aloof nerds.
Introverts are people who primarily look inward, paying close attention to their thoughts and emotions. It's not that they are incapable of paying attention to what is going on around them, it's just that their inner world is much more stimulating and rewarding to them.
It's true that I'm pretty oblivious to my surroundings and I drown myself in my own thoughts a lot. So much that sometimes it depresses me because I think and worry too much about things that might not even matter in the end.

Myth #9 – Introverts don't know how to relax and have fun.
Introverts typically relax at home or in nature, not in busy public places. Introverts are not thrill seekers and adrenaline junkies. If there is too much talking and noise going on, they shut down. Their brains are too sensitive to the neurotransmitter called Dopamine. Introverts and Extroverts have different dominant neuro-pathways. Just look it up.
 I'm not sure how true is this because I'm a bit of a thrill-seeker (think roller coasters, pirate ships, etc) but it is indeed true that I loathe it when everybody is talking at once; the noise scares me and it makes me feel giddy. I keep very quiet when everyone is talking in a conversation not because I'm being emo, but because I feel like my opinion is insignificant and not needed anyway.

Myth #10 – Introverts can fix themselves and become Extroverts.
A world without Introverts would be a world with few scientists, musicians, artists, poets, filmmakers, doctors, mathematicians, writers, and philosophers. That being said, there are still plenty of techniques an extrovert can learn in order to interact with introverts. (Yes, I reversed these two terms on purpose to show you how biased our society is.) Introverts cannot "fix themselves" and deserve respect for their natural temperament and contributions to the human race. In fact, one study (Silverman, 1986) showed that the percentage of Introverts increases with IQ.
I'm not saying that extroverts are bad, but I've never met one extrovert who didn't make fun of me for being an introvert or try to push me to be more extroverted. Just because I'm an introvert doesn't mean I'm a "loner", "anti-social" or "have no life". I shouldn't have to think of excuses to stay home instead of going out. So if you respect my space and let me be an introvert then I will respect you and be more willing to hang out with you.

You Might Also Like