So as promised, I'm gonna do a post on self-esteem/secrets. I've never been confident about my looks, and sometimes even what I wear. I just think that I'm not good enough. I seldom have days whereby I wake up and think, "oh, today's a brand new day and it's gonna be a great one." I get emotional easily and cry a lot. I do stupid things and I can't get over them. I try to be nice to everyone but sometimes it just doesn't work out. I find flaws with myself a lot. It's scary how I try to change myself and become someone I'm not. I'm a perfectionist - I hate it when things don't turn out the way I wanted them to. I have irrational fear of the darkness, heights, pain and needles. I eat a lot. I don't like drinking plain water.

It's not that I am not grateful of how I look, because I am.
But sometimes I just wish to be someone else.

Maybe I will marry someone in the future who will love my scars.
Who will love me despite me not being sexy and fashionable like kids these days.
Someone who accepts me for who I am, someone who understands.
I will marry someone who realize my flaws and still think I'm beautiful.

Everyone is.

I hope there is such a man out there.

The ones depressed don’t dress in black. The ones who believe they’re fat don’t announce it. The ones scared don’t scream. The ones struggling don’t show their scars. The ones hurting the most are the ones hidden.