Alrights , I reckon you people would like to see some real updates after me going on a somewhat semi-hiatus during the June holidays .
Went out quite a lot during the holidays , catching up with friends , lunch dates , watching of movies & simply spending time together . So I can say that my holiday's actually a fruitful & not wasted one (: .

My school holidays were also packed with Syf Opening Ceremony rehearsals . Although many complained 'bout the hours & the sacrifices we had to make , I believe that at the end of everything , all of us had a sense of accomplishment . The performance was really magnificent & I had to say that I especially enjoyed Catholic high's performance . I thought that it was really original .

The Syf Opening Ceremony not only taught me dance steps , I also learnt something else bout friendship . Yes , I've made many new friends but meeting old friends is the hard part of it . Looking at my primary school friends & realising how much they've changed , I know that we might never be close again but I'll never forget how we used to be . When we met , the awkward feeling in my heart that I was fear would be there was there . Even after we hugged , the awkward silence filled the air . I knew then , that people do change . Even best friends .
The picture above is the signature of two of my many instructors teaching us those dance steps , Jie Ling and Yee Shan :) .

School reopened in the blink of an eye , & there I am , back in school , studying , hanging out with friends again . Everyday's almost the same routine , nothing important for me to note down .
However , one particular event made me realise the importance of team spirit . I'll try not to mention any names here .

At the start , I wasn't really interested in the ICG . Those who know me will know that despite being a sporty person in primary school , I don't enjoy PE , morning run or anything sports related in secondary school . Some people signed up for the ICG , but on the day itself , everybody became disinterested in it , & some even wanting a walkover , claiming that it's best for the class . I know that some people were disappointed , even more so for our form teacher , one of the organisers of the event . The look on his face . That's when I decided that no matter what , I'll find enough people to play for our class , & I'll even take part in this event .

In the end , 2e3 played hard & well . We had 2 matches that day & we won one match , while the other match ended up in a draw . I would say that I'm really proud of the team players . Even though it was a few minutes before the game , we before we know who were officially in the team , we had some kind of bond & I know all of us fought hard . I didn't even think for one minute that we would achieve such great results but we did it . I'm really proud of the team , Vernon , Douglas , Jon , BenedictY , SuXian , YingYing , Xueying & me :) . At the end of the day , all I can say is that I don't regret being in the team . Yes , it's tiring , & it's tough . But the cheers , screams , smiles , \m/ signs & hi-fives we got after each & every goals we scored made everything worth it .

My school's having some exchange with other school recently & it so happens that Josephinetanmojo is posted to my class . Cool rightz ? HAHAHA , caught up with her bout lots of stuff & I miss the times we had in chalet , hohoho . There's another girl , Sarah , who was also posted to my class & she's super friendly , hyper & lame , HAHAH .

In a nutshell , life's been .. good :)

Today , I'm learning to appreciate & identify the slightest blessings in my everyday life (: Hopeful that I won't make the same mistake again .

-

何进怡，
你知道吗，我很想你。

I'm starting with the girl in the mirror
I'm asking her to change her ways
& no message could have been any clearer
If you wanna make the world a better place
Take a look at yurself & then make a change

I had a dream 'bout us , out together again .
Not only the two of us , but all three of us .
We were doing silly stuffs , laughing at retarded things , making stupid postures to take photos just to laugh at them . We had ugly hairstyles , but who cares . We were having fun . Just like the old times .
Then things changed , everything went wrong .
You turned yur back against us & walked out of our lives . We called out to you , but you didn't listen . We cried , but you didn't turn back .
In a flash , I was jolted awake from my dreams .
Everything happened too fast , all too quickly , I wasn't able to grasp it .
You walked out from my life , leaving beautiful footsteps & even more beautiful memories in my heart .

I looked at the photographs we've taken together , kept safely away .
They were of sweet memories , those when everybody was against me , & you were with me .
When we did nothing but danced the whole recess away , or running around the paradesquare/quadrangle , ignoring the obvious smirks of others . We did projects together , planned for prom , skipped gatherings just to have our own fun & being cheapskates .
Even when all 3 of us were always broke , we had always found a way to have fun together , like playing with paper at the arcade , going in neoprint machines just to take photos .
There's just so much that we've gone through together , I tried to remember everything , but I can't . I lost a best friend , one that I truly treasured , one that I can relate everything to , one that has been there all along .

I wiped the tears that had slid down my now wet cheeks & went back to sleep , knowing things will never be the same again .

021208 ;
& now , BestieN. , I miss you .

It's you again .
You hurt me a lot . & I'm gonna move on .
I've shed countless buckets of tears for you , but not anymore .
I'll be strong .

I'm giving up .
I'm not gonna let myself get stuck again .
There are many fishes in the sea , many trees in a forest .
I made myself believe that we're from two different worlds .

-

Love is always bestowed as a gift - freely , willingly & without expectation . We don't love to be loved , we love to love .

I thought we were bestfs . Maybe I was wrong ?
There isn't winning , losing or one is better than the other in true friendship .
Maybe you're feeling so insecure , therefore , you've told me all those lies . Maybe they weren't lies . But they seem too impossible to be true . Or maybe you just have a very dramatic life .
However , you keep trying t do stuffs like me , type like me , talk like me and all . I don't mind all these , really . I don't . Afterall , bestfs are supposed to share everything together , no ? But don't you think that you should be you , instead of trying to be me ? Won't it make you happier ? I don' t know , I truly don't .

I want to be a mirror image of God , I want t be more and more like God . I wanna be who God wants me to be .

-

Jesus, beautiful Saviour ,
God of all majesty ,
Risen King ,
Lamb of God ,
Holy and righteous ,
Blessed Redeemer ,
Bright morning Star .

All the heavens shout Yur praise ,
All creation bow to worship You .

How wonderful , how beautiful ,
Name above every name , exalted high .
How wonderful , how beautiful ,
Jesus , Yur name , name above every name , Jesus .

I will sing forever , Jesus I love you , Jesus I love you .

It's sad when people you know become people you knew , when you can walk right past someone like they were never a big part of yur life . How you used to be able to talk for hours , & now you can barely even look at them .
I don't understand how you can smile all day long but cry yurself to sleep at night . How pictures never change , but the people in them do . How you can love so innocently , but it can turn into anger so quickly & easily . How yur best friend can become yur worst enemy , or when yur worst enemy turns into yur best friend . How forever turns into a few short months that you'd do almost anything to get back . How you can let go of something you once said you couldn't live without . How even though you know letting go of something is best for you , it hurts just the same . How the people who once wanted to spend every second with you , think a few minutes of their time is too much time to spare . How people make promises, and bear their souls to someone despite knowing how common it is for promises to be broken .
& How people can erase you from their lives cause its just easier then working things out .

-

Dearest BestieN. ,
There's no need for me to mention names , 'cause you'll know who you are .
Bestie , we've drifted so much apart & I miss you soso much .
Everytime , you cannot find time to meet up w me . :(
Hurts me so much t think of how much we've drifted apart .
You , me , BestieW. - we used t be there for each other , remember ?
All those sweet memories from our P6 days . Sighz .
Time cannot rewind - I just thank God that pictures don't fade , so that I'll at least have them as memories .
These past few weeks , we're both involved in the Syf opening ceremony , & remember you said hi to me like bout , 1weekplus ago ? We've got no topics t say at all , how sad . I cried a lot after that :( .
From yur eyes , I could see that you haven't change but , we've totally drifted - it was like we've never met before .
I miss you , BestieN. .
You were always there for me , even when everyone was against me .
You're one true friend , I might never find .
Remember , our dance/song , "Can I Have This Dance" ?
I miss dancing w you .
Sighz . I miss everything 'bout you , dearest Bestie .

I haven't given up - sometimes I still wonder if we can be back like last time .

BESTIENG , I LOVE YOU STILL .

If you need a place where you can run, If you need a shoulder to cry on, When you need a healer for yur pain When you need someone to love you, Here I am.