I wonder if this is how all modern relationships end. We reason with ourselves that we don't feel anything towards our significant other anymore — as if that rationalises the act of cheating. We have no courage to walk out of a bad relationship so we cheat.

We fall for another person yet string our current along like it's nothing. We let them live in a lie simply because we tell ourselves this is less hurtful to them than leaving them for someone else. But is this what they want? At the end of the day, are we just trying to justify our own selfishness? Perhaps make ourselves feel better about cheating. A little less guilty? Or is it just that we want to have the best of both worlds? That if either party leaves, at least we still have the other.

Why can't we find the courage to leave before things turn sour? Why is it that we have to wait till the very last minute to do so? It's something I question myself frequently too. Why didn't I just leave when I started developing feelings for another guy instead of dragging things on and making it complicated, confusing and hurtful for all three of us. Just because I was a coward?