If looking back at memories makes you smile then you're welcome to look.
However, if it does nothing but makes you cry, you're better off moving forward.

I may have chosen the longer, more painful route. But I chose it. Appreciate my choice. I believe in fate. What's in store for me, will be mine.

I've been feeling really down the past week. However, here's something sweet that my best friend did for me that made me laugh.

If it's because of her eyes or her lips or her great body, its not love, its lust.
If it's because of her intelligence or insights into life, it's not love, it's admiration.
If it's because she cries every time you try to leave, it's not love, its pity.
If its because she makes you forget to study and sleep, its not love, its infatuation.
Love is when you don't know why you seem to be attracted to a person. It has a reason but it is unknown.

Who should I be now?

A girlfriend?
An ex-girlfriend?
A normal friend?
An acquaintance?
A best friend?
A sister?
Or a stranger?

I can be none. I am none. And I don't know which position to assume when talking to a guy I love, who wants to leave.

All I know is that every time I feel you, my heart still skips a beat.
Every time I hear you, I hardly can breathe.

If you are here, I wrote this for you. I wrote this for you and only you.
Everyone else who reads it, doesn’t get it.
They may think they get it, but they don’t.

Nothing is faster than the speed of thought.
I can look at anything and think of you.
It's not suppose to end like this. I swear.
If only you could give me another chance.
I'll make everything alright again...

You are like the melody that keeps playing in the background. It's not a conscious thought. It's just always there. And it was a sad tune.
But you turned it off. 

Once you love someone, even after you've moved on,
It will always hurt to see them with someone else.

I'll never love anyone the way I loved you.

I'm on my phone so no pictures today! I didn't attend school today and reported sick yesterday as I was down with fever and felt damn unwell. Baby sent me all the way home, to my doorstep and I was so touched! Okay, I went off topic for a moment. I'm back because I'm gonna continue with my 30 days challenge.

Day #3, Ten things you dislike.

#1, When someone compares me with my current boyfriend's ex-girlfriends. Be it looks, personality, figure or anything. Yes, I'm insecure like that but honestly, which girl likes being compared to? I'm not talking about anyone here but generally. So what if she's got nice eyes, she's 165cm (considered to be the perfect height in America) and she's popular? You can't expect me and her to be the same. Hell, we don't even have the same parents! We won't have the same genes.

#2, People who criticize me for my looks/personality. Also sometimes known as people who talk shit about me when they don't know anything. I might not be pretty, smart, tall, skinny, social, popular or perfect but this is me. You like me, good. You don't? I don't need anyone's approval. I've learnt that it's nice to be important but it's more important to be nice. As long as you don't continuously talk shit about me behind my back and act good to me, I'll be nice to you, even if you dislike me. This is who I am.

#3, When people think I know nothing just because I'm young. I've lost a loved one, been suicidal, went through a divorce, taken in all sorts of criticism. Even at a young age, I understood and knew more than adults think I know. I always knew if my parents were telling the truth by just looking at their facial expression. I'm not stupid. To be honest, I may be young, but I dare say I experienced and know more things that most fifteen-year-olds do. I'm not a little girl born with a silver spoon in her mouth (which leads me to point #4, you'll see why later). I was faced with reality since young.

#4, When people calls me 'xiao mei mei' just because I'm younger. I don't mean those coffee shop uncles/aunties who mean no harm. I mean those guys in their late 20s adding me as friend on Facebook. Then they ask me how old am I and call me xiao mei mei. I'm only a year away from being legal. Technically, it's exactly 5 more months before I can step into a theatre showing NC-16 movies with pride. Back to the topic, fuck off you pedophiles! What are you even doing on my page?! Shouldn't you be more interested in girls your own age, or is it that you can't get any?

#5, When I can't remember why I wanted to blog about. Pretty self-explanatory. You get a good idea, you note in down in your brain memo and then you totally forget about it. Happens to me ALL THE SAME. So it's not really my fault that I don't blog often! Blame it on my brain!

#6, When I see this absolutely gorgeous dress/blouse/shorts that I must have but it's WAAAAY out of my budget. Another self-explanatory one. Who else hates it when you see this cute dress and then you notice the price tag. Gosh, the price is even more cute. What a turn off.

#7, When I'm tired but just can't fall asleep no matter how much I try. Seriously! Like right now. I'm so damn sleepy but I'm determined to finish this post. But what I mean when I say I just can't fall asleep is that I lie on my bed, count 100 fucking sheeps and still stay wide awake. That, is pure torture.

#8, Attention seeking whores. No further explanation needed please. If you know that people don't like you, you jolly well shut your hell hole up and stop making more people dislike you, especially when you can't take criticism. Oh gosh. Can anyone get more annoying than this?

#9, Grammar Nazis. Also known as people who unnecessarily correct others' mistakes on their blogs/twitter/facebook starters. Okay, maybe blog I can understand. Facebook and twitter? Oh give me a break. This isn't fucking O levels. You know what's more annoying than these little grammar nazis? It's when they're correcting you when you're the one who's right and they are the one who's wrong. But alas! They just wouldn't admit their mistakes. They will insist that they're the ones who are right. Annoying little brats -___-

#10, Singaporeans who stomps every shit they see. Don't wish to elaborate on it as I'm really tired. But why can't Singapore just be more open-minded like the western countries? In Singapore, if we use fuck in front of a teacher, disciplinary actions will be take against us. In the western countries, saying fuck you is like drinking water. And in Singapore, if the lesson ended but the teacher continues teaching, we can't do anything about it but to wait for her to end her lessons. In the western countries, it's different. Once the bell rings, everybody goes off. Who gives a fuck to what the teachers are saying, we're rushing off to the next period. Singapore makes a big fuss out of everything, honestly. We're encouraged to be creative, but given no space to explore other things, given no chance to be creative. Don't get me wrong. I love Singapore. But sometimes I just don't agree with some of the things the government is doing.

#11, Lastly, I really dislike it when I post a freaking long blog post and nobody comments on how awesome it is. Like come on! You guys know I'm awesome. Stop asking me on formspring what colour did I dye my hair or what facial cleanse do I use. Comment on how much you love me instead! Okay I was just kidding! Don't beat me up!!!!

P/S: I know there's only supposed to be 10 things but up cares! I ended up listing more than I imagined I could have. I must have really hated lots of things around me huh. Joke. (You're supposed to laugh!)

Has anyone else noticed that Female is just Male with the periodic table symbol for Iron attached?

I know I haven't been updating lately! I'm sorry. I was too caught up with my everyday lives. I don't have the motivation to update recently because my Formspring's getting dead. If you guys want me to continue updating, do talk to me in my Formspring alright! Or else I'll just leave this place to rot. (I'm just kidding. I just want some attention LOL. I'll never leave this place to rot.)