Quality time spent

October 24, 2014

Every couple has a honeymoon period that they go through. When days feel like hours, hours feel like minutes and minutes pass by like seconds. When you stick to each other like magnets, eager to learn more about your other half.

But this doesn't last forever. Reality will set in, you will get busy with other things, you will eventually stop wanting to stick together all the time.

You always hear people say quality over quantity but what truly defines quality time spent together?

Quality time isn't just about being in the same room. It isn't "chatting" while using your phone. It isn't just physically being present. It isn't mindless window shopping. It isn't watching a show/movie together. It isn't "hanging out together" but each doing your own thing. It isn't "listening" to your partner talk while you type on the laptop.

Quality time is giving your partner the undivided attention s/he deserves even if it means that your other tasks have to wait. Even if it means that a text message has to be replied later. Even if it means you can't complete you game now. Even if it means you miss your favourite TV shows.

Unfortunately, quality time is surprisingly and increasingly difficult with our generation being so obsessed with technology and having phones glued to our hands all the time. I'll admit that it's difficult even for me. It's always so tempting to just take that 5 seconds to check who sent me a WhatsApp message. I'm sure we are all guilty of this.

You may think that 5 seconds isn't a lot but it has already affected the quality of your time spent with the people you love. I didn't always know this though. It came from one time when I was just laying down with someone I love. He had no TV in his room then and both our phones were charging. With practically nothing else to do and distract, we started chatting.

We just talked about everything under the sun. What happened in my life recently, the latest gossip with my friends and his friends, how exhausted his weekdays were and what he had done over the week, the newest assignments I had, the recent lame jokes and pick up lines we heard... Just about anything at all. I loved it.

We went on and on and I learned more about him. What ticks him off, what makes him laugh and even what makes him stressed. I trusted him even more because I was aware of what's happening even when I'm not around. I learned to see things from his point of view because I started understanding his life. Although I wasn't physically involved in his life during the weekdays, I felt that I was there for him during the weekends.

And throughout the rest of our relationship, no matter how much he spent on me on a date, there was nothing I enjoyed quite as much as those days when we were able to just talk about anything and everything at all the whole day without distractions.

So you see, money doesn't always make the world go round. It can buy momentary happiness but a good relationship is really what keeps the people around you happy. And that relationship (be it BGR, kinship or friendship) is built upon the quality time you spend with each other.

Have you been spending quality time with the people you love or your phone?

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